Nothing could have prepared me for the month of November, but who has ever felt prepared to face the unknown? Nobody, and not by themselves, they haven’t. Nothing is really known beyond the present moment we live in.

The start of November brought with it something old and familiar that I had not had to deal with in a long time. Four long years of being pain free and period free were rudely interrupted by a sudden and rapidly escalating abdominal cramp with pain that went from 0 to 8 in thirty minutes, followed by massive blood clots. Hello endometriosis and hello adenomyosis!

I never knew what a panic attack was until I experienced pain like this. Pain in 3D, where the body, mind and emotions are all so shocked and horrified that they lose control of themselves and any knowledge of self-help goes out the window.

For the second time in my life, I could sense I was about to have a panic attack, but it was an almost out of body experience and I seemed to have the ability to hit pause like in the Matrix movie and do a 360 degree analysis on what was happening.

In that moment, I chose to call out to Jesus for help, and help came in the form of Peace. I could sense the Holy Spirit right there with me, giving me strength to stay calm. A sense that I was going to be alright even while I was experiencing this hellishness. The fear shrank away. Peace ended up staying close throughout the month, and this is my testimony, shared with a joyful and grateful heart.

It May Look Like I’m Surrounded

I am beginning to get addicted to experiencing the supernatural with God. He speaks and shows up in the most awesome ways, and on this occasion, it was through a message that was preached on the topic of the presence of God, highlighting Psalm 27. What I learned gave language to what I was experiencing, and gave direction on how to process it and get through it.

We are not idle observers of the will of God but active participants in it.

The preacher referred to the example of David and his ability to hear from the Lord, as seen in his writings in Psalm 27, proving that we are not idle observers of the will of God but active participants in it. David refined his values to one thing, dwelling in the house of the Lord and seeing the beauty of the Lord. I immediately knew that God was speaking to me through this message.

Over the course of the rest of the month, I would end up reading this Psalm many, many times, and find relevance, reassurance and peace in it.

My Heart Will Not Fear

Blurry eyed with pain and physical suffering, I set about meditating on Psalm 27 and focusing on what God was saying to me.

PROCESSING THROUGH THE PAIN

Reading and re-reading this Psalm, I began to memorise the verses, and I realised that every time the pain flared up and the fear crept in, I could immediately speak out these truths over myself.

“God, you are my light and salvation, I will not be afraid.”

“Lord, you are the defence of my life, why should I be afraid?”

“I’m living in your house and seeking your face Lord. You are lifting me above my pain and suffering. Hear my shouts of praise from this joyful heart.”

“God, these adversaries – endometriosis and adenomyosis are here to devour my flesh, but they will stumble and fall.”

“War is breaking out inside my body, but I will not be afraid. I am confident that you defend my life.”

“I will NOT be afraid, who should I be afraid of? Why must I dread? God is my defence.”

These were not mere words from a book, these verses were literally life saving to me all through November. Proverbs 4 verses 20 to 22 really are true!

My son, give attention to my words;
Incline your ear to my sayings.

Do not let them depart from your eyes;
Keep them in the midst of your heart;

For they are life to those who find them,
And health to all their flesh.

Health indeed!

On Earth As It Is In Heaven

What’s amazing is how all of heaven and earth comes together for us when we call out to Jesus.

Between the blood of Jesus, the Holy Spirit, the Word of God, all of heaven rooting for me, the prayers of my family and friends and my own willingness to trust Him, I was escorted like a VIP through the longest period of pain I have ever experienced.

Today, I know this firsthand, that God is with us in the struggle, in spite of what we are going through He is right next to us. As we realize that He never leaves us, He never lets us down, He never walks off and leaves us we can say,

God is there, ready to help;
I’m fearless no matter what.
Who or what can get to me?

Hebrews 4

Pray For Each Other

I want to share some practical ways to support yourself and others during sickness, whether it is physical, emotional or spiritual.

How To Support Yourself When You Are Sick

  • Pray for yourself
  • Keep your spirit tuned in to what God is speaking
  • Fill your heart and mind with the word of God
  • Use the Word of God in your prayers
  • Ask someone to pray for you
  • Update those who are praying for you, so that they can pray with specifics
  • Document the journey, so you can give praise to God and knowing that one day your testimony will bless another.

How To Support Others When They Are Sick

  • Attempt to understand what the person is going through so you can be specific with your prayers (if the person isn’t comfortable sharing, thats ok, pray anyway).
  • Pray for the person, set reminders.
  • Pray with others for the person.
  • Use the Word of God in your prayers, it has the power and the answer.
  • Meet or call the person that is sick, giving encouragement and support.
  • Keep checking in on the person regularly (often sick people get forgotten after the initial prayer request is shared).
  • Stay sensitive to what the Holy Spirit is saying (bringing that person to mind, reminding you to pray for them, giving you insight and knowledge)